Things I Wish I Knew Before My Mom Died – Ty Alexander

Published By: Mango Publishing
Pages: 154
Released On: 29/09/2016

The grieving process. Ty Alexander of Gorgeous in Grey is one of the top bloggers today with a wonderful personal connection with her readers. This is never more apparent than when she speaks about her mother. The pain of loss for mourners is universal. Yet, we all grieve differently. For Alexander, the grieving process is one that she lives with day-to-day. Learning from her pain, she connects with her readers on a deeply emotional level in her book, Things I Wish I Knew Before My Mom Died: Coping with Loss Every Day. From grief counseling to sharing insightful true stories, Alexander offers comfort, reassurance, and hope in the face of sorrow.

Coping with loss. In her early 20’s reality smacked Ty in the face. She was ill equipped to deal with the emotional and intellectual rollercoaster of dealing with her mom’s illness. Through her own trial and error, she found a way to be a caregiver, patient advocate, researcher, and a grieving daughter. She wrote Things I Wish I Knew Before My Mom Died to help others find the “best” way to cope and move on, however one personally decides what that means.

Mourning and remembrance. In the chapters of this soul-touching book, mourners find meaning and wisdom in grieving and the love that always remains.

Inside this comforting and insightful book find:

  • Help with the pain of losing a loved one
  • Assistance in understanding the grieving process
  • Comfort and support while learning how to move on


It’s a weird choice of book to read when your mother is still alive, I grant you. But I lost my dad in 2017 at the much-too-young age of 57 (I was 24), and whilst he had been ill for a few months and we knew what the endgame was, I was still wholly unprepared for what came after.

I do see myself reflected in Ty’s story though. I am also a writer (although I don’t currently get paid for it – but my trade is writing and editing), and when I can’t express my feelings through voice, I do it in writing. It’s my safe space, it’s what I do when things become too much and I wish I’d known about this book when I was at the start of my bereavement journey.

If I was going to critique this as an actual book, I’d say it’s maybe a bit rambly, a bit repetitive and could do with some tidying up. But I don’t review these types of books as just a book. I’m sorry if you think that’s wrong for a book reviewer to do, but I just can’t. It’s not about the book physically, or the sentence structure, the grammar or chapter length – it’s about what the words can mean to someone.

This isn’t a self help book and it’s not a memoir. She isn’t telling her life story and she isn’t telling you how to grieve. Whilst you will all go through grief at some point, everyone’s grief is personal. I did recognise my grief in hers, but it is not the same. But this is her story. She’s put it down on paper for herself, to be a comfort for herself and others. Death and grief is very lonely, even if the room is full of it, so it helps to have someone in your corner, holding your hand and telling you, you can do it.

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